Friday 5 June 2015

TTC diary #1

Before we begin.. some TTC lingo for those who don't know the abbreviations! 

Tuesday 5th May

I did a video and blog post the other day about how I was so broody.

- broody adjective (WANTING CHILDREN)
informal If someone, especially a woman, is broody, she feels as if she would like to have a baby
But lately, I feel like it is more than that...It's not just a tiny, squishy newborn I want. It's a sibling for Sienna... It's being a Mother of two kids...  It's being a family of 4. 
The ups and downs, the juggles and struggles, the never having a minute to yourself.. that's what I want and it's so hard to wait!
Friday 8th May
I'd barely be a week pregnant, if I even am. But I really feel like I am.. I feel like I can feel it. I think I ovulated around 30th March and a few days after that, I had serious cramping.. I'm wondering if maybe that was implantation? I'm trying not to think about it too much so that I'm not disappointed if my period comes in 8 days time, but it's so hard! Warren said it won't happen the first month of trying, but I'm not so sure.

Sunday 10th May
Today I'm 90% sure I am pregnant.. I have had nausea all day and been so exhausted I even napped when Sienna did for an hour and a half! I also have that disgusting taste in my mouth that makes water taste gross and makes me want to just keep eating to get rid of the taste. I've also been close to tears all day for no reason at all and had lots of lower back ache and that stretching feeling really low down in my stomach/pelvis... But I bet tomorrow I'll be back in the mindset that there's no way I am and I'm imagining all this. It's going to be a loooong week (period due around 16th May)
Thursday 14th May

TTC diary
I did a HPT and it was a BFN which I kind of thought. It's funny, all week I was sure I was pregnant but was trying not to test, then when I went to buy a test, I just knew I wasn't. It's like reverse psychology isn't it? I was SO nervous, when I was in the shop I was physically shaking and such a mess, I nearly burst into tears. The thought of it being positive was too much, terrifying and exciting at the same time. I was a little disappointed it was negative but I guess it's just the wrong timing. Maybe next month? 
Saturday 16th May
I grabbed the test from Thursday out the bin just to have another look and swore I saw a faint line. I asked Warren and he said the same so I did a digital one but it definitely said 'Not pregnant'. We only did this one because I wanted to be sure as we are going out tonight. But still negative, just need to wait for AF to arrive & then wait until ovulation to try again next month. I have downloaded the My Days ovulation app to see if it helps? I'm always pretty sure I know when I ovule but keeping track can't hurt.
Sunday 17th May
AF is here!

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